Hong

“There’s always this thing in front of you that you never feel satisfied with.”

By Students of NYC

May 15^th, 2023

"I’m writing my senior research paper on video games. Pro gamers, they can react within milliseconds. That’s one second divided by one thousand. It's just reaction speed, right?

To be honest, it's a little like life. In real life you have to be quick to catch up with every opportunity that’s possible.

In third grade, I remember I was considered sort of in the 'bottom' of my class. I never did the assignments. Then one day, I just thought, like, I don’t think this is a fit for me. I started to work hard. Every Saturday and Sunday, I would read through this whole entire social studies textbook— like 200 or 300 pages. Then one day, there was a test. And the words I studied were on it. And I was like, wait, I know this! I finished that test so quick. Everyone else was still working. I walked around the class a little — smiling, you know, I was in a dancing kind of mood. I realized I’m actually capable, I just had to let myself learn. Now, I’m going to Fordham in the fall. I’ll study for three years there until I can do my engineering degree at Columbia.

There’s always this thing in front of you that keeps on happening and you never feel satisfied with — education. There’s no such thing as being too smart; there’s always someone smarter than you.

I felt like that too after I got my first pay. I used to help my parents with their restaurant. Taking orders, going out to buy stuff, sometimes even cooking when we were really busy. Six to eight o'clock, when all the people came in. I’d start to heat up and think— my hands need to go Godspeed. Sometimes I’d mess up the orders. I’d feel so bad. I just would say, 'I’m sorry. I’m sorry.' Some people would yell, or curse, and I’d just keep saying sorry. But then I got my first check. I looked at it and was like, finally, I can buy something I want. I was looking through Amazon and would say — this thing looks good. Then I’d say, wait, no, this! This looks even better.

When I was young, I remember I would feel satisfied with just getting a slice of pizza. It would make me fulfilled. There is no such thing as being satisfied, to be honest. It’s like saying: after I get this thing, I’ll be fulfilled. But there’s no such thing. Like getting a toy right? You really want this toy before you get it. Then suddenly, after you get it, you realize, you don’t want it anymore. You want something else. It works like that.

Many people ask what the purpose of life is. Is it money? Cause, to be honest, all of us and our goals revolve around this money thing, right?

People want to be happy and fulfilled and reach this goal, but the thing is, as time goes on, that goal will change. It can go higher, right?

One of my happiest moments was towards the end of middle school. I was just sitting with my two friends and eating in the school yard. We were talking about games, and then we were like, yo, what are we going to do this summer when we graduate? Should we go somewhere together, or hang out? And one of them was like, 'Hmmm, no I don’t think I’ll have that chance.' And then the other one’s like, 'Yo, we can go and sing somewhere.' And then the other was like, 'Oh wait, we can probably go to that amusement park. Or a museum.' I don’t know what it was, but I was so happy. Imagining the possibilities, you know? Just having one of those chill and happy moments, eating our plates.